Over the years, I've developed an appreciation for lists. The goal isn't to make more work. It's to stay focused. A list keeps you on track and holds you accountable for accomplishing the things you set out to do.
If you're in a rut and struggling to get shit done, a list is helpful. If you need a reminder of what a cool-ass-dope-ass person you are, a list will be a helpful pick-me-up. If you need to make sure you do certain things to advance in life and grow as a person, guess what would remind you to track your progress...a list. Who knew I'd be such a proponent for the very thing I dreaded doing once a upon a time ago? Let's get into some personal development and list making.
Take Time to Reflect
Something is in the air. It's been in the air for a while for a lot of of us. I've been in some kind of transition or timing for the last few years or so and I feel others have as well. The 2020 pandemic slowed time to halt and with that standstill, I had seconds, minutes, days, weeks and now years to reflect and discover aspects of who I am...or maybe give myself permission to be instead of looking to others to grant me access.
I'm still learning and accepting parts of myself I haven't always in the past. I'm still allowing parts of myself to have a moment on stage. I'm still getting to know myself in relation to others, meaning I'm focusing on my relationships and interactions with others. I have to get clear on my needs as part of this journey to have more fulfilling relationships and sharpen my interpersonal skills. This involves self-help books, personal development reading, research, finding the right therapist and form of therapy, vision boarding, binging reality shows for social observation, crying spells, and lots of alone time.
Take time to reflect if you have personal goals for yourself. Take time to reflect if you've found yourself in this loop of situations a la "same script, different cast." Take time to reflect if you're in a challenging time in life. Take time to reflect and slow down when your world has been rocked.
Reflecting will give you the material to form your list. 😉
Your List is Specially Made for You by You
I have this tendency to let outside noise (like other's opinions, projections, fears, and unsolicited advice) get inside my head and indirectly affect me and what I do. Don't get me wrong. Outside feedback, especially when it's solicited and then provided with your best interest in mind, is critical for growth. With that said, there's an extent to which you can consider others' opinions because you ultimately know yourself. You know what you need to be your best self. Know one knows you better than you. You know your mind and inner-most, deepest thoughts, fears, feelings, desires and motives.
There's time, experiences to have, and wisdom to gain down the road if you're not quite sure you know all of that about yourself just yet. Taking some time to sit in silence and reflect on what's worked out for you and what you haven't acquired just yet is a step towards getting acquainted with yourself. I can't lie...bouncing questions and thoughts off an emotionally intelligent professional who's equipped with the tools to reflect ideas back to you is useful in this whole self-reflection process.
As you sit with yourself and maybe consult others about your actions and behaviors, write down some gems you stumble upon. If you hear a good soundbite from a kindred spirit that resonates with your soul, jot that valuable note down.
I needed to see written down the actions that will ground me. I needed to see the reminders to stay true to myself and move closer to my purpose -- which is helping others in some way. Because when I'm right, I'll be right for others and fully show up like I want and like they need.
Self care and Self Love as a List
Because care and love are verbs. I sincerely believe. My list started as gentle reminders that popped into my head and then I'd jot them down here and there. Then I got intentional and sat down to make a list of actions I could take to stay on track. I could read that list of reminders and absorb the thoughts and then subconsciously embrace and act on them. Repetition becomes routine and routine becomes a lifestyle. I found compiling my list to be a very therapeutic activity.
I started my list in 2020 and it is still very much relevant today. But as I take a fresh pair of eyes to it, I realize I've consciously made it a practice to do the things I set out. It's happening. It's in progress. I continue to work on my communication. I remember to breathe at moments. I try to stay present in the moment. I'm mindful of accepting help and asking for it instead of taking on the load by myself because I'm worthy of it. My list is repetitive because I've probably said the same thing in another way, but that repetition helps me. My list is growing and I'm pretty sure it's gonna get to 100 things, but that's a good thing. I like seeing my progress and seeing where I was and what I needed at a given moment in time.
If my personal reminders to self inspire you to create your own, I'd love to know about it. Take some of mine if they resonate. Leave me a comment or message me!
How do you check yourself?
I keep a list handy
It's all in my head
I ask friends to hold me accountable
Write an answer
Awesome read, friends think my daily task list is funny but it holds me accountable.